Sunday, October 31, 2010

Halloween brings November skies

It's been a strange day, and not because of goblins or ghosts or trick-or-treaters  since my day has been devoid of all three. I am alone on the farm for the first time since purchasing it. There are plenty of life forms here, but none whose company I choose to keep. Jerome has suggested he'll bring Dovey when he comes this weekend. I'm hesitant to separate her from Mya. I surely would love to have her here, but is that too selfish? Right now I would love to be watching Jerome enjoying the simple act of giving out the Halloween candy. It would be heart warming to see my kids' old hand made decorations and the lights along the sidewalk, and the silly plastic jack-o-lantern with its electric illumination. I enjoyed having some Halloween decorations around the house here and will be sad to pack them all away. The season moves too quickly past.
The sun set this evening with a decidedly November glow. Sunsets in November are unlike any other time of year, and always remind me of the year Jerome was at UM and I was teaching in Illinois and still living with my parents... a dreadful last few months before our wedding, a time of separation and desire and dissatisfaction with my new profession. I did not fit in my own skin then. I couldn't help but reflect on that today, as once again I found myself separate from the man I love and in a new and slightly uncomfortable position. But I realized after a bit how the years between then and now have strengthened me even if I sometimes need convincing. 
Happy Halloween.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

testing 1, 2, 3...

So here's what I've done so far...

baby steps

Exploring the terrain, on the farm, in my head, on my blog. A little bit more on all fronts each day.